Jack Bauer vs Samuel L. Jackson

[redwurd]

Jack Bauer refused a syringe at a blood bank. Instead, he asked for a gun and a bucket

"Maybe it means: you're the evil man, and I'm the righteous man, and Mr. 9mm here, he's the Shepard protecting my righteous ass int the Valley of Darkness. Or, it could mean: you're the righteous man, and I'm the Shepard, and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that, but that sh** ain't the truth. The truth is: you're the weak, and I am the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo, I'm trying real hard to be the Shepard."

Ok Ouphe since you're going back to school, I thought I would give you a little exercise of your brain, and *gasp* test your loyalties......

In an all out last man standing, only 2 may enter 1 may leave battle of Epic Badassadness, who would win? the combatants:

Jack (after running out of ammo, Jack stood in the line of fire, took 3 shoot to the chest, and used them to reload) Bauer versus
Sam "I've had it with these motherfu**in' snakes on this motherfu**in' plane!" L. Jackson?

[Joppi]

Chuck Nor- *is shot*

[starscreamrobot]

Sam's one of the most powerful Jedi of his time, he takes it with ease.

[thebountyhunter]

fuck joppi i was going to say that anyway i dont watch 24 and samuel would shaft him anyway.

[hanzrimer]

Shouldn't it be Bauer vs a particular Sam Jackson character?

[Strider]

UGHHGHGHHGHHGHGHGH.....

Jack Bauer is not badass and 24 is the worst show EVARRRR.

Result: Sam Jackson defeats Jack Bauer via verbal assault at 0:05 in the first round.

[BURNZILLA47]

In a fight between Sam Jackson and Jack Bauer the winner would be.......BURNZILLA.

[redwurd]

Hanz I mean Samuel L. Jackson the person, cuz he is Samuel L. Jackson! He is the sum of all parts!
Plus I hate to admit it, but I have NEVER seen an episode of 24

Somehow I knew BURNZILLA would chime in and make it all about BURNZILLA! lmfao!

[thebountyhunter]

lets see.

jack bauer vs. shaft ( winner shaft )
jack bauer vs. mace windu ( winner mace widu )
jack bauer vs. his guy in spirit ( winner spirit guy )
jack bauer vs. snakes on plane ( snakes on plane is winner )

in the end overall winner is chuck norris

[redwurd]

sorry thebountyhunter but Chuck Norris wasn't even in the ring!

Plus really? I know back in the day, ya Chuck was kick ass! but um that was 20 years ago! He's like what in his 60's now?!?

Ok for the 'old school' amongst us - Chuck Norris vs Arnold Schwarzenegger battle who would win?

[thebountyhunter]

hmm the texas ranger vs. ze terminator

chuck all the way.

you do know when arnold says ill be back, he goes and asks chuck norris for help, but he has to rest for burnzilla because the last time they met anold got a roundhouse to the face.

[Strider]

Rex...FTW.

[redwurd]

In a battle between Jack Bauer vs Samuel L. Jackson for the TITLE of BADASSADDNESS.....................AND THE WINNER IS...............................

GREGORY HOUSE, MD!!!
WTF?!?

Yup the dark horse, came outta completely nowhere.
And why and how you may ask? Well House is House after all you can't define nasty, it just is. House would have the combatants meet at different times and secretly drug them, and operate on them. He would switch Jack Bauer's brain with that of Samuel L. Jackson's and put Samuel L. Jackson's brain in Jack Bauer's body. After a long recovery Jack/Sam and Sam/Jack would battle it out, but with Jack's brain in Sam's body and Sam/s brain in Jack's body, they would only wind up killing themselves and not each other, so therefore they would forfeit the match!

WIN GOES TO GREGORY HOUSE!!!

HOUSE RULES!!!